30 CommentsJoJo's Bizarre Adventure / By Shinmaru /

JoJo’s Bizarre Adventure: Stardust Crusaders episode 5 – BUTTS


Shinmaru: “I asked my sister’s friend what she saw, and this is what she told me: ‘He had two right hands . . . and a GLORIOUS ASS. My god. Those cheeks could crush a boulder. Actually, I might have seen his face, but I’ve forgotten what it looks like because, seriously, THAT ASS. What were we talking about, again?'”

Yep, after this episode and the preview to the next one, I’m totally convinced David’s going for the whole shebang with this adaptation. Much as I enjoy this battle (it’s the first “fighter think of a clever workaround to opponent’s powers” fight in the series), it definitely could’ve been paced quicker, and the battle featured in the next episode is eminently skippable if the production team just wanted all the cool, important stuff fit into 24 episodes. Good news is once we get out of this early portion of the story, the battles have more of interest going on (since the whole point of most of them is figuring out the enemy’s ability); therefore, the pacing will feel more organic (because there’s a clearer build) and less “gotta stretch things out and explain everything.”



Joseph is also getting more moe by the episode. I really enjoy the forced perspective in this shot. Jotaro’s just plucking out a little Dio bud, he’s not ripping an octopus out of Polnareff’s brain! (Oh, yeah, we can call him Polnareff now since he’s actually named in the first few seconds. The “Eiffel” joke was nice while it lasted.) But yes, Joseph is the cutest racist old man. Very angry that nobody thought to hug Joseph and make it all better. Quite rude, if you ask me.

I will say that as much as the general pacing is getting to me, I do love seeing everything in motion. Silver Chariot’s sword flourishes, Magician’s Red being a GIANT BURNING BIRD MONSTER, Polnareff’s posing, and so on. For as much as the sluggish pacing hurts the fights, all the color and motion and whatnot evens it out. Polnareff skewering coins with fire between the coins helps, too. If someone told me Polnareff is a French magician, I would absolutely believe it. He’s already goofy like a magician. Silver Chariot’s armor also seems prime for some tricks. Be a magician, Polnareff. It’s your destiny.


I’ll leave Scamp to talk about other stuff, but before I leave, HEY BUDDY. Looking forward to seeing you again in like 35 episodes or whatever it is.

Scamp: The pacing is getting to me a little too. It’s not so much that the fights are slow, but it’s taking a while to get to a fight that I can get a real feel for the stakes. To draw a comparison, this fight between Avdol and Eiffel (thanks Shinmaru, but I will always call him Eiffel in my head now, plus Polnarwoof is too hard to remember how to spell) is stakes-wise similar to the one between Joseph and Caesar. You know, the one where one character shoves a pigeon in another person’s mouth. There never felt like there was any doubt anybody would get hurt in this fight between Avdol and Eiffel, yet we spent a full episode on it.

jojjojojAs excited as Shinmaru is for these fights, I’ll admit I’m not really feeling them yet. Colour design is as great as ever. They might even be a touch better visually thanks to David Production having more time and money to work on this season. But again I think the lack of real stakes at play in these battles means I’m not getting invested in the twists and turns. And no Joseph, shouting out what just happened on screen isn’t going to get me more invested. I don’t need you to tell me how many mirror images of Eiffel’s stand he made. I can count up to 7 you know.

I think probably the biggest demonstration of how I’m not feeling the fights is how much I eagerly anticipate the moments when they’re not fighting. As soon as the fight ended and they started goofing around in Hong Kong again? That was my favourite part of the episode by far! Joseph started acting like himself again. Eiffel got to show different sides of his personality. It was goofy and highly entertaining. I’m not sure how the show can get me invested in those fights again, although I don’t think animating fights that you could remove from the story with no serious impact as Shinmaru suggests is the right way. On the other hand, maybe if the characters started acting like themselves during the fights they would become more entertaining.

jojojoI’m being rather harsh on Jojo’s here. I feel a bit Asian Father-y about this, but I know Jojo’s can be so much better.

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  1. Posted May 3, 2014 at 1:57 pm | Permalink

    I am disappointed, I was counting on Scamp to admit that Avdol is not so very useless that he thought. Well, plenty of next occasions.

    • Scamp
      Posted May 5, 2014 at 9:48 pm | Permalink

      It has to be first proven that Eiffel is not also useless

  2. D13560
    Posted May 3, 2014 at 2:12 pm | Permalink

    Yeah they’ve kind of screwed up the pacing by including every single line of dialogue of the manga. That type of dialogue feels way better in that medium than in here. The Red Bind (original) scene and the first trade-off between Magician’s Red and Silver Chariot was the best part of the fight since there was no dialogue.

    Let’s hope they adapt each stand fight into an episode, since they get longer and longer, the writers will be forced to actually cut down on the Captain Obvious dialogue. Of course the fights with Dio and the one with his most fabulous minion can be 2 episodes each.

    Judigng by the previous Scrappy Doo will appear, boo.

    • Posted May 3, 2014 at 5:27 pm | Permalink

      Even with the first season’s pacing, that would be impossible. The Dio fight is 18 chapters lol.

      • D13560
        Posted May 3, 2014 at 7:57 pm | Permalink

        Well the original OVA handled the Dio Fight in 2 episodes (although they may have been 30 minutes, not sure) and that seems to be a well received fight or at least the best thing about the OVA (which may not be saying much, though).

      • Shinmaru
        Posted May 5, 2014 at 4:07 pm | Permalink

        I forget exactly how long the Dio episodes were, but they were probably in the 35-40 minute range each.

    • Shinmaru
      Posted May 5, 2014 at 3:59 pm | Permalink

      Yes, it’s really the dialogue that’s slowing everything down. Really wish they’d be a bit more judicious about what to include.

  3. fathomlessblue
    Posted May 3, 2014 at 2:30 pm | Permalink

    Yeah, the pacing is obviously going to be slow as balls from now on but I still rather enjoyed the Stand duel. The new Street Fighter 2-esque alt. colour schemes that have occurred during the climax of the last two battles have been particularly great. I know the last arc liked its static frames, but watching entire scenes played out with such vivid colours is pretty great.

    Really my biggest issue so far is NO CHARACTER DEVELOPMENT FOR THE STANDS! We know nothing about them. Does Magician’s Red enjoy long walks across the beach and romantic candlelit evenings down by the fireplace? Does Silver Chariot act as a charming and chivalrous wingman when Polnareff’s tries to chat up a female stand user? Is Star Platinum the lead singer of a weird glam-rock/reggae hybrid band in his spare time? Does Hermit Purple view himself as the perverted tentacle monster to Joseph’s moe teenage girl? So much untapped potential! So many wasted opportunities!

    • Posted May 3, 2014 at 2:52 pm | Permalink

      Don’t wish for the show to have even slower pacing by trying to fit in Fire Emblem-like support conversations (for relatively minor dudes) into the story.

    • Shinmaru
      Posted May 5, 2014 at 4:09 pm | Permalink

      And where do they hang out before they’re summoned?!

  4. strukingfourd
    Posted May 3, 2014 at 4:36 pm | Permalink

    The music has been pretty shallow as well.

    • Shinmaru
      Posted May 5, 2014 at 4:14 pm | Permalink

      I don’t remember much of the music off the top of my head at all, haha.

  5. Nagisa33
    Posted May 3, 2014 at 4:37 pm | Permalink

    In every episode so far “Menacing” pops up in some way, usually at silly moments.

    • Shinmaru
      Posted May 5, 2014 at 4:17 pm | Permalink

      Are you trying to say that spoons aren’t actually menacing?

  6. gedata
    Posted May 3, 2014 at 5:19 pm | Permalink

    Neither of you included this pose in your screen-caps. Shameful

    • Posted May 3, 2014 at 7:58 pm | Permalink

      That was the best pose to far.

    • Mr. Anon
      Posted May 4, 2014 at 11:37 pm | Permalink

      Yeah, when I saw that I thought “this for sure has to be the main screen cap for the episode on the cart driver”, but nope, only tears now.

    • Shinmaru
      Posted May 5, 2014 at 4:19 pm | Permalink

      You’re shameful

  7. Dio
    Posted May 3, 2014 at 6:50 pm | Permalink

    I think that this was a good episode. Avdol is amazing and i can understand why they don´t behave like themselves in fights. You need to remeber that in fights you need to have full concentration, because if you make a mistake you can lost and in JOJO that mean that you can die.

    A good real life example that proof how people behave different in fights than in daily life is Floyd Mayweather. Most of the time he is an arrogant person that like to be very excentric, but in the ringside he is a very calculator person that is very mature with a calculator mind.

  8. C
    Posted May 3, 2014 at 7:22 pm | Permalink

    I think the fights start to get really cool starting with a nice guy named Forever.

    • Shinmaru
      Posted May 5, 2014 at 4:20 pm | Permalink

      That fight is fine, but I think the spectacle is more entertaining than the actual battle.

      • C
        Posted May 5, 2014 at 8:10 pm | Permalink

        Yeah I know I am just saying that’s were I think the fights start to pick up.

  9. Posted May 3, 2014 at 8:01 pm | Permalink

    I feel like I would enjoy this more in manga form, which is whittling away my patience and making me want to skip to the original material.

    • fluffymoochicken
      Posted May 4, 2014 at 3:14 am | Permalink

      Oh yeah, totally. The dialogue doesn’t feel so slow in written form.

      I seriously believed that the OVAs would have taught David Production about how NOT to do a Jojo adaptation, by making the pace so slow and deliberate. I guess I was wrong about that one.

    • Shinmaru
      Posted May 5, 2014 at 4:25 pm | Permalink

      It’s definitely much snappier in manga form since the dialogue doesn’t bog everything down.

  10. Posted May 3, 2014 at 8:15 pm | Permalink

    Joseph has clearly resolved himself to carry on Speedwagon’s legacy in this arc. The fact that Shinmaru is calling him moe and Scamp is complaining about him does nothing but confirm this.

    While I’m loving the presence of actual animation in these fights, and am enjoying the anime more than the equivalent stretch of manga so far, one of the things I liked so much about the first season was how briskly it raced through everything. It all went by so fast that there was really no time to question any of the ridiculous stuff that was going on or for any of it to get old – the show kept thundering on and you just had to roll with it. I’m not getting that as much with the slower pacing of Stardust Crusaders. Still, though, this is like complaining about winning only a million dollars instead of a million and ten.

    Polnareff is my favorite new character in the whopping 3.5 volumes I’ve read of the manga, so it was pretty sweet to see him in action this week. And I love all the random French – it’s far more fun to hear it than to read it when hearing it comes with a heavy Japanese accent.

    Also, BUTTS.

    • Shinmaru
      Posted May 5, 2014 at 4:31 pm | Permalink

      We’re also continuing on the path of my opinion being correct.

  11. fluffymoochicken
    Posted May 4, 2014 at 3:19 am | Permalink

    I actually enjoyed this battle a teensy bit more than I remembered liking it in the manga. But yeah, the first two volumes of Stardust Crusaders are pretty mediocre. I hope that everyone can stick with it long enough to get to the really incredible stuff.

    Also, fingers crossed that the next battle isn’t stretched out into an entire episode. x__x

    • Shinmaru
      Posted May 5, 2014 at 4:27 pm | Permalink

      I feel like these first couple of volumes are Araki establishing Stands before going really nuts with what they can do.

  12. Nazaren
    Posted May 7, 2014 at 9:02 pm | Permalink

    Joesph > Speedwagon.

    Loving it even if the pacing is a bit grating. If this gets stretched far beyond 24 eps, that’s fine with me. More JoJo is more JoJo, even if it’s SloJo.

    Also, Eiffel (it’s here to stay) asking if Joseph had two right arms. He knows how thumbs are placed, right? Removing a glove isn’t going to shift them around… probably. It is Joseph afterall.

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