44 CommentsJoJo's Bizarre Adventure / By Shinmaru /



No, I can’t even pretend to be coherent when choosing post titles anymore. Also, it was a tough choice among this, Joseph telling Cars he’s going to bury him in a volcano, EVIL SQUIRREL and JET PIRANHAS as the lead screenshot. This made me cheer the most, though, so there you go.

As a quick aside: I just came back from a great trip to SakuraCon in Seattle where I met up with my cohort, Inushinde, among many other fabulous folks. I even met one of you dear readers at the convention! That was pretty wonderful; it made me wish I had played up my visit much more on here so that some more opportunities like that might crop up. Well, just so you all know, as long as I get the time off, I’m planning on attending Anime Boston and Anime Expo this year, as well. If you’re in the area, be sure to say hello!

Anyway, enough of that shit, let’s chat about how CRAZY AWESOME this episode is!

First off, the sound effects in the OP got me so hyped. For any other series, that would fall flat on its face, because it’s rather obtrusive; for JoJo, though, it’s so damn goofy that I ate it up. Hell, I watched it again immediately after finishing it! Makes me wonder if there will even be an OP next week, since it seems like this would be the type of stunt you’d pull for the finale. Or maybe David Production will just use the sound effects again next week for the hell of it. I’d laugh.


Then, of course, EVIL VAMPIRE DUBSTEP SQUIRREL. I knew this squirrel would be evil as soon as it went over to kick it with another squirrel, but damn, it didn’t even pretend to be nice before tearing into that other poor squirrel! The perfectly timed drop made me laugh quite hard. It’s also too bad this scene got censored, because I definitely wanted to see that squirrel tear into some squirrel guts. Yum. Also Nazi guts! I mean, I know they’re Stroheim’s buds and all, but I can’t feel too bad about them getting their torsos chewed through. They were sacrificed for the grand cause of ultraviolence. That’s really the best that you can ask of a Nazi; it’s the same with the Nazis whose faces are melted at the end of Raiders of the Lost Ark.

But I’m sure Cars would have murdered them all if the squirrel hadn’t done the job first. Lots of fresh meat is the perfect way to test out new powers, yes? But Cars has his laser focus on Joseph Joestar. I laughed hard at the callback to the beginning of the arc — I’m pretty sure everyone saw that coming when Joseph started hyping up his plan. Of course, like all Joseph Joestar plans, it evolved into something a bit better midway through . . .


. . . PLANE AGAINST ULTIMATE BEING. Truly a beautiful sequence with Cars flapping his lustrous wings in pursuit halting only to shoot hardened feather bullets that morph into god damn piranhas. Really, this whole post should just be a .gif of me bowing to the computer, eager to deliver whatever offerings the series desires to remain strong. There are no limits to the pulpy battiness of JoJo’s Bizarre Adventure. That’s what I appreciate about the developments in this episode: Cars has become an Ultimate Being, and, damn it, the powers inherent in that status are going to be shown off. Cars morphs his hand into a squirrel, a flower and a butterfly? Fuck it! Cars gives himself wings that can turn into shields, projectiles and killer fish? Fuck it! Cars can make an octopus/squid materialize to destroy the plane’s engine? Why the fuck not! JoJo doesn’t use the status of Ultimate Being to make Cars all powerful and boring. He’s going to do some shit with his newfound abilities.

But we need not fear for Joseph Joestar, for he always has tricks up his nonexistent sleeves. I knew the parachute trick was coming when the scene was set up with all long shots, but Cars’ reaction and Joseph going kamikaze made that bit of predictability worth it. And Stroheim? Fucking Stroheim. World’s greatest Nazi. He can launch his fist, and he’s willing to let his legs explode to save Joseph from a fiery, magma-filled death. He’s definitely a keeper; Joseph should get Speedwagon to pull some strings and funnel him to America so that the government can secretly hire him to do stuff. That is, if America doesn’t brand Speedwagon a traitor for his blatant connections with the German government. Holy shit, Speedwagon, you’re not even trying to hide it! Is the Speedwagon Foundation REALLY funded by oil money, or is that just a convenient story?

Next episode will be wonderful, I’m sure. Even though Cars is all melty, he is clearly not dead; you don’t even need to peek at the episode preview to know that. I assume the way he is dispatched will be truly outrageous, and I cannot wait to see that, along with Joseph predicting Cars’ final words before kicking his ass. That has to be how this ends. Nothing else will be acceptable.







truly awe-inspiring

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  1. nazaren
    Posted April 1, 2013 at 10:51 pm | Permalink

    This episode was just… I don’t even know. Ludicrous?

    Stroheim in the pontoon was the crowning moment though. This show can do literally anything it wants to, and I’ll love and accept it.

    • Posted April 2, 2013 at 3:34 pm | Permalink

      Basically every adjective that can be used to describe batshit insanity is applicable to this episode. Perhaps they should all be combined into a single expression of bizarreness.

  2. Gravethestampede
    Posted April 1, 2013 at 11:25 pm | Permalink


    • Posted April 2, 2013 at 3:36 pm | Permalink

      That is definitely great, but I think the best stats page still goes to Golgo 13: http://www.baka-raptor.com/wp-content/uploads/2009/11/golgo_bio.jpg

      • jo
        Posted April 2, 2013 at 4:26 pm | Permalink

        “At any rate, an amazing penis”
        Pffft what a weird guy that magaka must be.

      • Nadgers
        Posted April 2, 2013 at 5:05 pm | Permalink

        Fun fact: Golgo 13 is Hirohiko Araki’s favorite manga.

      • gravethestampede
        Posted April 2, 2013 at 5:29 pm | Permalink

        I wonder how it compares to Hisoka’s schwing-a-ding. Cars doesn’t even need his, being the most Alpha thing around

      • Posted April 3, 2013 at 3:18 pm | Permalink

        @Jo: Golgo 13 is often a weird manga!

        @Nadgers: I can see why! I bought all 13 volumes available in America, and pretty much every story is awesome.

        @gravethestampede: I would imagine Cars’ is probably bigger, since he is inhuman.

  3. Gravethestampede
    Posted April 1, 2013 at 11:29 pm | Permalink

    Somebody really needs to change Speedwagon’s adult diaper, he was really freaking out. Not a good example of how to handle stress.

    • Posted April 2, 2013 at 3:37 pm | Permalink

      To be fair, he’s a frail old man confronted by the Ultimate Being, and all his best buddies have been murdered his entire life.

  4. Posted April 2, 2013 at 12:09 am | Permalink

    That squirrel part destroyed Cars for me. It was so cute when he protected that dog and those flowers back then, and now he outright murders an innocent squirrel :(
    But I love his laugh.
    And I love the soundtrack which just came out and is awesome.

    • Posted April 2, 2013 at 3:38 pm | Permalink

      Cars sending a squirrel to maul another squirrel has propelled him to ultimate evil status..

  5. NormalMar
    Posted April 2, 2013 at 12:18 am | Permalink

    Stroheim is bonkers, he is the best.

    • Posted April 2, 2013 at 3:39 pm | Permalink

      It’s pretty amazing that he’s become cooler with every appearance.

  6. Pusswookie
    Posted April 2, 2013 at 12:18 am | Permalink

    Broheim currently, and firmly, holds the (admittedly not very prestigious) title of being my favorite Nazi.
    I wonder if Stroheim is just helping JoJo because Cars isn’t congruent to his [slightly more Aryan] vision of an ultimate being?
    Btw the new music is awesome.

    • jo
      Posted April 2, 2013 at 1:57 pm | Permalink

      I do think it’s great that “the ultimate being” in this show is an ultra-fabulous non-white male Aztec (?) supervampire wearing make-up, jewelry and a loincloth. The nazis with their macho white superior complex must be so bitter.

      • Posted April 2, 2013 at 3:42 pm | Permalink

        I believe the Pillar Men are quite a bit older than the Aztecs; it’s just that that particular sect of the Aztecs (or maybe the Aztecs as a whole?) worshiped the Pillar Men and/or the stone mask for their power. We can’t even describe the Pillar Men with our racial/ethnic terms, anyway, since they’re entirely different beings. They are above race and culture!

      • jo
        Posted April 2, 2013 at 4:23 pm | Permalink

        Whatever they are, they’re not Aryan and have more superior powers than German military men. It must vex Stroheim and the other immensively.

        Wow I loved the scene where Kars survived the sun rising and got wings. I’ve been waiting for this the entire time.
        So fabulous, now with added colours and dubstep and evil old-man laugh.
        *happy sigh*

    • Posted April 2, 2013 at 3:39 pm | Permalink

      It’s a good thing that Hitler didn’t get his hands on the stone mask and the Red Stone of Aja.

  7. Gravethestampede
    Posted April 2, 2013 at 12:54 am | Permalink

    On an unrelated note, The Fart Thriver would’ve been a better choice I think. Next year maybe.

  8. rubberluffy
    Posted April 2, 2013 at 2:28 am | Permalink

    I have this really strong feeling you’re gonna enjoy the finale, especially the end of Cars.

    I can’t believe we’re already almost at the end. If I don’t get a Part 3 teaser in the next episode my heart is gonna break.

  9. Posted April 2, 2013 at 4:04 am | Permalink


    Some people are squirrel-handed. Gregor is a weird name.

  10. Scarlet
    Posted April 2, 2013 at 6:47 am | Permalink

    The title for this post perfectly expresses my feelings about this episode, thank you. My favorite part is still the evil hand squirrel; bless this anime for making such a moment possible. It was almost awesome enough to keep me from yelling at the screen about Lisa Lisa. Hello, anyone–medical attention for the gal? …anyone?

    Hey, and I was at SakuraCon too! Next time you should give us folks a heads up. I would’ve loved to stop by and say hello! :)

    • Posted April 2, 2013 at 3:55 pm | Permalink

      Yes, get some help for Lisa Lisa!

      And, yeah, this is why I should have been more vocal about my intentions to attend SakuraCon. I’ll try to attend again in the future!

  11. Nadgers
    Posted April 2, 2013 at 12:53 pm | Permalink

    There was actually one more showing of Cars’ powers that they skipped here. Though since it’s kinda sorta a plot point, it’s most likely going to be in next episode.


    • Posted April 2, 2013 at 3:56 pm | Permalink

      More of Cars’ crazy powers will definitely be welcome!

  12. Friend_guy
    Posted April 2, 2013 at 2:18 pm | Permalink

    Always a great post, but you forgot to mention we were treated to another showing of Cars Amazing Mane once again. Look at that rockstar hair flowing in the sunlight as he stands in perfectedness… I feel dirty just saying that I need some soap.

    Anyway the squirrel was truly the best bit though. Vampire scroll acting so cute that everyone paused to go “awww” he doesn’t look that evil. Then BAM! Squirrel busting through peoples guts Alien style. It would be funny if they made a OVA with the Squirrel becoming a main villain Dio style and something like a Mouse or other small creature was forced to fight it for the sake of the Animal Kingdom!

    • Posted April 2, 2013 at 3:57 pm | Permalink

      I am too in awe of Cars’ glorious hair to properly reflect on it.

  13. Billish
    Posted April 2, 2013 at 2:50 pm | Permalink

    The dub squirrel had me in tears. It was so obvious but soooo funny – and the audio transition was perfect. Can’t wait for the finale of this great show next week. Also looking forward to the announcement of Stardust Crusaders *knocks on wood*

  14. R1CK_D0M\
    Posted April 2, 2013 at 5:53 pm | Permalink

    That fuckin op with the SFX is perfect. tips everyone off how awesome this episode is going to be. So glad they held out on us all this time.

    btw the fact that the opening pic isn’t a gif of Cars in the sunlight with hair flowing is a shame to all, though I do agree Stroheim was the most awesome in this ep. I almost screamed at my screen “YOU GO BROHEIMMMM” except I was in public.

    btw was I the only one who thought jojo would use some sort of secret nazi base technology shenanigans to launch cars into space? (maybe even into the sun)?

    • Scarlet
      Posted April 3, 2013 at 12:36 am | Permalink

      “btw was I the only one who thought jojo would use some sort of secret nazi base technology shenanigans to launch cars into space? (maybe even into the sun)?”

      That’s what I was thinking too! When Jojo said, “Nothing on Earth can stop him” I immediately assumed the next logical step would be to go to space somehow. Well, “logical” for JJBA…

  15. prants
    Posted April 2, 2013 at 6:29 pm | Permalink

    you should totally come to anime boston! it’s a blast!
    but also, when speedwagon tried to tell jojo about lisa lisa… i mean come on! just let the guy find out already!

  16. Madu_Scientisto
    Posted April 2, 2013 at 8:10 pm | Permalink

    Broheim’s theme song, (in all of its silly Japanese butchered German glory) is the best. That is all.

    “Wehrmecht (sic) sie sind Wehrmecht (sic)” *cue nazi latin-esque chanting

  17. cybustier
    Posted April 3, 2013 at 10:48 am | Permalink


    Joking aside, all Speedwagon’s done was giving the Nazis a bunch of souped-up Ultraviolet lamps. Not much you can do with those except giving allied troops cancer veeeeeerry slowly. They flew themselves in to Italy and patented their own Cyborg Aryan technology.

    He hasn’t got links to them any more overt then many other high profile American businessmen of the period. He’s certainly less deserving of charges of Nazi sympathising then the likes of Henry Ford (aka Mr. Got an Honourary Plaque from Hitler for Hating Jews).

    • Posted April 3, 2013 at 3:46 pm | Permalink

      This is true. At least Speedwagon isn’t outright anti-Semitic or shown to buy into Nazi ideals. He just wants to kill some vampires.

      • T
        Posted April 4, 2013 at 10:49 am | Permalink

        He seems to buy into some of them – remember those villagers in Mexico?

      • cybustier
        Posted April 4, 2013 at 12:19 pm | Permalink

        That’s Stroheim you’re thinking of, not Speedwagon. Bro though he may be, Stroheim is still a FUCKING NAZI.

  18. Alt nadgers
    Posted April 5, 2013 at 8:13 pm | Permalink




  19. Posted May 8, 2013 at 9:16 pm | Permalink

    An additional benefit of this product is its expense.

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