16 CommentsJoJo's Bizarre Adventure / By Shinmaru /

JoJo’s Bizarre Adventure 12 – Nazi Technology Brings Vampires Back to Life


It was pretty crazy when Carlos Santana got tired of playing “Smooth” for the millionth time and did this to Rob Thomas one year at Lollapalooza.

So, wow, this might be the one episode so far where I am somewhat glad it was censored all to hell. There’s so much seriously gross action and imagery in this episode that I barely know where to begin! Maybe with the shot above? Santana is, right off the bat (pun not intended), a strange vampire. Perhaps I’ve been reading all the wrong stories, but I’ve never seen one with his particular abilities before. It doesn’t feel wrong, though; in fact, it probably makes sense that he differs from the garden variety vampires created by way of the masks. This is probably the difference between those pseudo-vampires and a “natural” vampire (presuming, of course, that Santana wasn’t turned into a vampire himself due to a mask — you never know). But, yes, Santana is the sort of vampire who can manipulate his body to the degree that he can squeeze through air vents and plunge into faces.

You’d think the more traditional vampire power of morphing into mist would be more convenient for that sort of thing, but there is one disadvantage to that power: It’s not nearly as gross as forcing yourself into a human face and then expanding his body to a grotesque degree. It’s also not nearly as conducive to mass amounts of bloodshed.

Santana’s phasing power is interesting, too, and also leads to quite the disgusting moment where Santana absorbs the attacking vampire into his being, ripping the creatures arms and jaw clean off, and, I think, tearing the other vampire’s chest open. It was tough to tell exactly what was happening since the scene was crazy censored (though still quite horrifying to watch, because I could still imagine very well what was occurring). Makes me wonder how Joseph could possibly defeat him, but we really don’t know yet how the Ripple will interact with Santana’s abilities. We do know from Dio and Jonathan’s battles that there are ways for vampires to counter the Ripple, so even though Joseph has been ripping through opponents at an astonishing rate so far, I don’t think a fight against Santana will be particularly easy. But, hey, I didn’t think the battle against Straits would go like it did, either!


Ever since a certain someone pointed out in “Phantom Blood” that the characters poses resembled voguing, I can’t get it out of my head when characters stand around the way they tend to do in JoJo. Look at that weird stretch the vampire is doing there. Who does that?! A JoJo character, that’s who. Also, I had a laugh when Santana came to life naked except for some vampiric briefs. I am too lazy at the moment to hunt down the manga image, but is he wearing the underoos in the manga, or is his bulbous vampire dong flopping about? Inquiring minds want to know! Or maybe it’s just me. Probably just me.

There are almost too many strange images in this episode to write about. Take this fisheye shot of Stroheim laughing at Santana, for instance. It’s a weird image, but it also says a lot about Stroheim: You see how warped and maniacal he is, a twisted leader through and through (although his actions and words also convey this plenty, haha). It also shows how petty and full of hubris he is, though his laughter and general mockery of Santana before he even does anything is indicative of that as well. Oh, those Nazis, always ready to proclaim their superiority!


And I would of course be remiss if I didn’t bring up big sexy “Tequila Joseph” somewhere in this post. Obviously Nazis have no concept of physical beauty. Who wouldn’t want some of that?! My body is ready for your Ripple, JoJo~

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  1. rubberluffy
    Posted December 25, 2012 at 12:53 am | Permalink

    It must have been seriously demoralizing for Joseph to have his excellent disguise fail so quickly. I’ve already forgotten if the anime left it in, but I don’t think they had his “but what about my skirt check?” bit. Joseph is the best.

    I don’t know if “vampire” is really a good term for what Santana is. Regular old stone-mask vampires seem to just be casual food sources as was clearly shown. Usually he’s just called a Pillar Man because of obvious reasons. Next episode title is “JoJo vs The Ultimate Life Form”, so you could call him that, too. Also, no episode this week, next is on the 4th :(

    Araki is a huge fan of fashion, particularly Italian fashion magazines. He’s actually done some JoJo x Gucci crossover ads for one of the Japanese store locations. A lot of iconic JoJo poses are what you’d see in some weird high-fashion mag (and some actually were). I love Santana’s weird flexy pose when he had that vampire’s arms and legs sticking out of him.

    • Posted December 25, 2012 at 4:58 am | Permalink

      Hahaha, man, that is sooooooooo not surprising about Araki!

  2. Alt nadgers
    Posted December 25, 2012 at 1:10 am | Permalink

    I wont be able to see this episode for a while but since it has Santana I think it’s going to be a treat.

    Btw, did they change the ending theme? I heard some rumors about that.

    • Posted December 25, 2012 at 1:11 am | Permalink

      Nope. The ending animation is different, but “Roundabout” is still (rightfully) the ED. However, both the opening animation and music are different.

      • Posted December 28, 2012 at 6:51 am | Permalink

        Also, they did briefly play the riff from Owner of a Lonely Heart at the end of this episode. That was a bit of a surprise. Though it quickly cut out to make way for Roundabout.

  3. Clinton
    Posted December 25, 2012 at 3:55 am | Permalink

    Yeah Vampire is not the best word for Santana given that he has pretty much no vampire traits and is so much better then one. For example he does not need his brain in order to regenerate while a vampire does. (Added on his regen is much better then a vampires period.) Also yes Santana did just rip off the entire front of the vampire by letting it phase into him.

    • Posted December 25, 2012 at 4:58 am | Permalink

      Well, I have no other frame of reference for him! It’s clear he’s a different sort of creature, but not to what extent.

  4. Billish
    Posted December 25, 2012 at 5:28 am | Permalink

    Tis a shadowy dong in the manga.

    The bulbosity is left up to the viewers imagination, so you’re in the clear.

  5. Stef
    Posted December 25, 2012 at 10:54 am | Permalink

    So many PANTSU

  6. hint
    Posted December 25, 2012 at 11:29 am | Permalink

    Stroheim laughing says Happy Xmas thecartdriver.

  7. fluffybunnyboy
    Posted December 25, 2012 at 2:01 pm | Permalink

    Yes, voguing (or “Jojo posing”) is a definite trademark of Araki’s artwork, and something that fans LOVE about the series – if not for trying to imitate them in real life. xD It’s also occasionally parodied in other mangas and anime:


    (^All of these poses were originally done by buff Jojo men, naturally.)

  8. TheVoid
    Posted December 26, 2012 at 3:03 am | Permalink

    Vampires and their abilities vary between so many legends. There’s one out there of perfectly normal women by day, but are detached heads with all their organs flying around drinking the blood of pregnant women through their intestines at night.

    So Santana is just a different superior breed of vampire. Truly the Master Race of Vampirekind.

    Joseph is also a very pretty lady.

  9. Jojo Fans
    Posted December 26, 2012 at 3:01 pm | Permalink

    WARNING: Kinda spoilers for those who didn’t read the manga. Actually, Santana (and the others soon appearing) is not a vampire. They’re called Ultimate life-form. The stone masks were created by them so that they have greater food source i.e. vampires. So, yeah. He’s like a goat herder; breeding food and eating them once in a while. Oh, and they can actually change their cells to fit their need as demonstrated in this episode (and many to come). That’s all kids.

  10. Taka
    Posted December 27, 2012 at 8:24 am | Permalink

    I wonder if Stroeheim is gonna be Jojo’s hype man this time around. Where would Jojo be without a blonde dude losing his shit over every move Jojo makes, even if he is a Nazi.

  11. Himari
    Posted December 29, 2012 at 4:37 am | Permalink

    When they played Owner of a Lonely Heart near the end, I thought I had lost my mind. I was already like, WTF? for most of the ep. The OoaLH riff was just icing on the crazy cake that was this ep.

    The voice acting this ep was hilarious. Lots and lots of extraneous shouting. Good stuff.

  12. Nadgers
    Posted December 30, 2012 at 8:53 am | Permalink

    Wow, they made Santana seem a lot less arrogant this time around. Pretty nice, he was a bit grin happy in the manga.

    Also Stroheim is so fucking great, best nazi ever.

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