33 CommentsVisual Novels / By Scamp /

I’m using the Mass Effect: Paragon Lost anime as thin justification to write about Mass Effect

Mass Effect: Paragon Lost is Bioware teaming up Funimation and Production IG to make an anime movie version of their game, because we all know how much the gaming community loves anime. It’s a story about James Vega fighting the collectors. I don’t know who James Vega is because I haven’t played Mass Effect 3 yet. I have, however, just finished playing Mass Effect 2, and I really want to talk about it.

There, you see. Mass Effect has an anime. Therefore the Mass Effect games are related to anime. I am totally justified in writing about them on this blog.

Shut up, it’s my blog, I can do what I want.


With the exception of the Pokemon games, where the girls look like they’re wearing socks on their heads, I tend to choose female characters when playing games. I think it’s largely novelty factor. In games you’re normally just A Dude, and I’m already A Dude in real life, so I like to mix things up a bit by role-playing as me with a vagina. What really shocked me with her though is that, despite knowing that all her lines were written for a male character, she still felt like a Female Character, if that makes sense. There’s a trick in writing that, if you don’t know how to write female characters, you just write a male character and change the gender. In a game like Mass Effect which is so obsessed with sex and identity, that seems like it would be a bad move. I think me being sold on FemShep is largely down to the voice acting. There’s a teasing tone to her voice that works. It’s so effective at selling Female Shepard that I struggle with imagining her lines being spoken by a guy instead.

I was originally going to name her ‘Coqundbalz Shepard’ until my sister, who was looking over my shoulder when I was starting up ME1, pointed out this name didn’t make sense because she was a girl, so I changed it to ‘Noqokatal Shepard’. She’s got dark skin (because I want to tick all the anti-privilege boxes) with short-ish red hair and these big green eyes. I didn’t muck around with the character creation too much, because I’ve learned from games like Sims that what looks good in the testing area can sometimes go terribly wrong once you let them out in the world. The eyes were the one area where I set a few of the sliders to strange levels, giving her those magnificent big green eyes of hers. It’s those eyes more than anything that sells me on her being the saviour of the galaxy. They are the stare into your soul type. The ones that would gaze unflinchingly at monsters. The eyes of one who had seen hell and survived while still keeping love in their heart. Am I straying into creepy territory a bit here? Yeah, I probably am.

Mass Effect 1 is still great

When I told twitter I was playing Mass Effect 1, a load of people said that it wasn’t great or that ‘it hasn’t aged well’. The only big improvement I could see that ME2 made was taking out the micro-managing of weapons and gear. The rest seems largely the same. I know handling that stupid truck in ME1 was really frustrating, but ME2’s solution of having you throw probes at planets from orbit is the most boring tedious piece of rubbish ever. At least going down to the planets made the galaxy feel like big. One of my favourite moments of the original game was going to The Moon and looking up at Earth. I hadn’t seen Earth at all in the game, and it’s barely referred to, but glancing up from inside the truck at it was a real moment where I had a think about where humanity had come in that game. It’s not quite the same when you’re just farting probes at it.

I also miss the big Citadel. I get why it’s not quite as big in ME2. They’re trying to give you lots of different places to visit, rather than just one big place. It’s just big enough to create the illusion that it’s a huge city, but has enough going on and variation that it doesn’t fall into the problem Bethesda RPGs have in that there’s just an awful lot of repetition and nothing. ME2 just doesn’t have that same sense of scale. I was super pumped about going to see the Migrant Fleet to meet the Quarians, but when you get there you can only go into something like 4 rooms. Same with the Krogan homeworld. These are places that had been built up over two games as landmark iconic homeworlds, and not being able to get a sense for what they are truly like was a bit disappointing.


I’d heard of this mysterious concept called ‘Role-Playing’. I treated it in the same fashion I treat recreational drugs: I’d never done it, not because I’m against it, but because the opportunity to engage in such activities had never presented itself and I wasn’t particularly bothered in searching out such an experience. Mass Effect is the first game where I did find myself actively role-playing, where I would approach certain decision points by rationalising “well, my Shepard is X so she would do Y”. Conversation choices aren’t made for gameplay benefit reasons (for the most part, I’ll get to that later), but you also have limited scope in how Shepard will react. I started trying to rationalise why I made certain choices by what Shepard would do rather than what I would do. Since Shepard is both a woman and courageous, two things I am not, it helps me to distance me from her choices and roleplay as her.

It made for an interesting mix. I thought Ashley was a racist cow so was really mean on her early on in the game, so I reasoned that Shepard was anti-space racist. My tendency to save lives I rationalised through her pre-game heroic status as a sole survivor and that scarred her into being determined not to let any of her men die. There’s that tough decision at the end of the first game where I saved the human fleet rather than the council, which rather went against the Paragon/Renegade thing the game was on, but I reasoned thus: The council were space racists because they hated the humans were raising too high in the ranks, wouldn’t let the volus or hanar in, and kicked some other species out of council space altogether. Meanwhile Shepard wouldn’t have been able to live with herself for letting another bunch of people die under her command, so she saved the humans.

In ME2, I drank a lot of alcohol at night-clubs. This was largely to see if Shepard would eventually collapse and throw up in the toilet on the Normandy (which partly came true), but I figured that she was drinking to overcome her guilt in letting the council die. This in turn helped me make decisions elsewhere. She kept talking to Jack despite her being clearly a psychopath because Shepard’s guilt made her believe that if she stuck up for this girl, her own guilt would eventually go away. ME2 gave you the option of punching people in the face mid-conversation, which was pretty baller so I did that a lot, obviously because Shepard’s fractured nerves meant she snapped a lot more easily. However that was counted as Renegade, which brings me onto my next point…

Moral choice bullshit

I know Mass Effect doesn’t label it as good vs evil, instead as Heroic vs Badass, but it’s still bullshit. Someone who is short tempered and punches people in the face when they keep talking nonsense won’t always be the same person who agrees with the use of the Genophage. It’s so dumb to split these into two sides, particularly something as complex morally as the Genophage is. Often I’d come out of conversations getting both Heroic and Badass points because I just chose whatever felt right for Shepard to say at the time. It wasn’t a problem for the most part, because the way I played Shepard lent itself to Heroic more often than not, but it did mean I didn’t max out my meter by the end, which eventually crossed the line into some gameplay issues. For example, when Miranda started fighting with Jack, my Heroic bar hadn’t filled up so I just sided with Jack because of Shepard’s guilt trip she was on (also because for god’s sake Miranda, talk about first world problems compared to Jack). But when the game was coming right towards the end, I realised I needed Miranda on my side so it came about filling that meter. The last Big Mission I did was Legion’s, which should have been an incredibly complex moral choice, but I barely paid attention to it because I already knew I was picking Heroic.

And you know what? Miranda still didn’t side with me by the time I reached the end, which I’m pretty certain is part of the reason why so many people died in that last mission. I was expecting some people to die, so I don’t really mind. You live with your actions in Mass Effect. I didn’t mind Thane dying, because he had made peace with dying and had already said this was his last purpose in life. Zaeed also died, which was sad but he had seen it all, so it was a fitting place for him to go. But one other person died on that mission. After being abused as a child, growing up on drugs, being traumatised into a being filled with hate and disgust for all human life, Jack was finally onto some path of recovery under Shepard before being grabbed by a bunch of teeny tiny bugs and flown away, stored alive and being turned into fuel for a big robot. That was such a depressing way to end her life, doubly annoying because I hadn’t picked her for any of the key positions or anything. She was just with me in my normal team, but was still dragged off. I’m going to keep the game save as it is, because I feel I should live with my actions in those games and replaying feels like cheating the system, but boy was that such a depressing sucker punch.

Boring human teammates

The human team-mates are generally the worst, but special mention to Jacob for being the blankest most boring piece of Yuji Everylead the Bland. Miranda may have been a stuck up bitch, but she had the confidence and intelligence to back that belief up, so she got a bit of respect from me for that. I always chose the angry options for Miranda, but I reasoned that was because she was similar to Shepard and that pissed her off a bit because she didn’t want some young upstart with dat ass muscling in on her space. Plus her loyalty mission, while not the best story, was certainly the most emotionally touching. Even Ashley is better than Jacob. Ashley was racist, but at least that’s a character trait. Kaiden was way better in every way too. He had a genuinely interesting backstory instead of being just some soldier. Also Kaiden was moe as fuck and I got endless entertainment from teasing and flirting with him. Which did come to a bit of a head when he challenged me for flirting with Liara too.

Yeah, on the romance…

Sexy Times

When I said Mass Effect is rather sex obsessed, I wasn’t just talking about the romance subplot. So much of alien interaction and society is based around gender and sexual reproduction and relationships. Loads of the incidental conversations you hear in the game are people in marriages or trying to chat each other up or wondering aloud whether Asari are brainwashing them into thinking they look like sexy blue people. Some of the gender politics can go a bit off at times. I mean, there is an entire race of sexy blue alien hotties, all of whom seem to spend their youths as strippers. I’m really not sure what to make of the fact you can sit down and watch Asari strippers with no gameplay benefit. I thought the stripper would give me information, but after sitting there for a few seconds I realised this was just for me to jerk off to-I mean appreciate Asari culture. *cough*

Anyway, that time where Shepard sat and watched Asari strippers allowed me to have some point of reference for her clearly being into Asari and would therefore choose Liara instead of Kaiden in ME1. I felt kinda guilty, because I had essentially been leading Kaiden on before friendzoning him and getting off with an alien chick instead. Plus Liara is…well, kinda goofy. Her airy fairy dialogue is so silly at times, talking about spiritual bonds with a voice like she’s come out of Rivendell. I liked her most when she was acting a bit naive, or fangasming over Prothean ruins. That all said, if you have a game in which you can have lesbian sex with aliens, why on earth would you instead decided to have a boring old hetrosexual relationship with a human? I’d always figured Garrus was a better fit for Shepard than Liara was anyway. You have no idea how delighted I was when Shepard started giving him The Eyes in ME2.

Philosophical debates

Anti-space racism seems like an obvious choice, but I guess that comes down to me being very anti-nationalistic anyway. There is a strong case to be made in looking out for human interests in the space game, because otherwise your people get fucked over. If you look at it as fighting for equality rather than supremacy, then it becomes an easier pill to swallow. Cerberus in that case is a bit like the IRA. They stick up for the oppressed in the region, but on the other hand their terrorist activities are despicable. Plus while the people they claim to represent want equality, both the IRA and Cerberus want supremacy (or be part of the Republic, which is the same general idea). It doesn’t seem like Mass Effect pushes that agenda all that much, but again that could just be my personal political filter. As much as a claim to be role-playing, I still have my own baggage I carry over to Shepard.

The other questions that came up were more difficult for me to make my mind up on though. I never particularly cared for Tali in the first game, and I did also say earlier that I found the Migrant Fleet bit disappointing, but that’s not really the case. It’s only the scale that bugged me. The political debate they were having was really interesting, particularly since it went through a whole load of options I had never considered. I figured the only options were either defeating the geth or forgetting about them and finding a new planet to call home. But then one dude suggested trying to make peace with the geth, saying they had only attacked because the Quarians had attacked them first. Another said they should subjugate the geth and put them back under Quarian control. The bit that threw me the most though was a totally incidental piece of dialogue from a dude who was researching a dying sun. He pointed out that confining yourself to a planet is so dangerous when stars start randomly dying that it may be the best idea to stick to a migrating fleet altogether.


Mordin’s mission was the one that really threw me for a loop. There were times when I’d just sit there for ages thinking about the logic and morality behind the genophage. On one hand, it’s pretty clear that, at the time, this was the only real option. Peace wasn’t attainable with the way the Krogan people operated. Mordin explained the genophage as not crippling their population but instead as returning it to normal levels. The state it was in originally was the anomaly, caused by their evolution on this harsh planet. It was not a system that worked well with space travel. You’re not actually killing anyone, you’re changing birth rate. But then I’d recall my conversations with Wrex and all the other Krogan in the game and realise how utterly depressed and without hope they were. They’re practically dead inside, weighed down by cultural crippling. It’s a resentment that defines their people. When you look at where it left the Krogans, it’s a really difficult decision to live with.

Mordin is probably the best character generally. I never used him in combat because he was fairly useless. I tended to stick with a variation of Jack/Garrus/Kasumi/Tali. But he had the best loyalty mission, had some of the best lines, was kind of a badass in a unique way, and most importantly of all, he can sing! He sings in children’s TV shows! Brutal killer scientist appears on a kids’ TV show to brag about his racial inclination towards science. It’s like learning Bill Nye runs a clinic in a Somalian pirate town


I was a little bit shocked that the DLC cost so much. I had planned to get it all, but since there was no package deal, I only got Kasumi and Shadowbroker instead. Kasumi’s mission isn’t anything special, although there is a neat moment with the Statue of Liberty’s head. The real value of the DLC is having Kasumi on your team. She’s like Zaeed in that you can’t really have a conversation with her, just stand around while she monologues at you. Her stories aren’t as good as Zaeed, but she makes that up for being awesome to use in combat. Her special ability is to turn invisible, run up behind baddies and then punch them in the back of the head. I particularly enjoyed doing this against Harbinger. He’d be all “I WILL END YOU” only for Kasumi whack him in the back of the head mid-taunt.

Shadowbroker was weirdly different in tone to the rest of the game. It was still fun, but it was like they had brought in Joss Whedon to write the script. Liara complaining about my driving felt like a callback to the way my Shepard acted in ME1. In ME1 my team was usually Liara and Garrus, so I used to rationalise my shitty suicidal driving as Shepard trying to show off to Liara. I did prefer this new rendition of Liara though, because she was less airy fairy and a bit more badass. Although then she came to my quarters after the mission, I was reminded of how friggen silly her normal personality and dialogue is. It was made doubly silly by my choice of outfit. With the Kasumi DLC, you get a formal black dress for Shepard to wear. I normally didn’t wear it because Shepard’s tough manly walk and bulging muscles looked kinda dumb in that dress, but I put it on for that mission because I figured she’d want to get dressed up for her old lover. Thing is, they didn’t redo Shepards’ poses shots so you get her awkwardly spreading her legs to Liara in a ‘come and get some’ pose. Then again, maybe that was deliberate…

Replaying as ManShep

Replaying as ManShep is something I plan to do eventually. I’ll make him an ugly fucker with a huge beard, act like a big racist and see how many team-mates it is possible to have die in the last mission. That does mean I’d have to save the council instead of the humans, but I’ll rationalise that by pretending ManShep can’t function as a racist if he doesn’t feel like the Aliens are lording it over him. Plus when I play ManShep, maybe I’ll get to see what’s under Tali’s suit? Judging by where some of the conversations with Tali were going in ME2 with FemShep, I’m going to hazard a guess that you can romance her if you pick ManShep? As I said before though, why would I pick to have boring old human sex with Miranda, even if she does have dat ass, when I could go for an alien? I’ll just pretend ManShep thinks she’s actually a human under there, but when she finally takes it off it’s too awkward for him to say anything else and just rolls with it.

Mass Effect 3

I’ve heard that ME3 is a bit of a disappointment (I’m pretty sure hermits in the Himalayas where their only contact with the outside world is messenger pigeons have heard that ME3 is a disappointing). I originally thought it was just for the ending being poor, but more and more I’m hearing people say the entire game is bullshit, which I struggle to believe. So long as the game is still about talking to aliens and listening to their silly conversations, then I’m cool. Maybe knowing the ending doesn’t take my choices over the previous 2 games into consideration much will lessen the disappointment. Some people have even suggested just leaving it altogether, but I can’t do that. I’m way too invested in this story not to know what happens next. Perhaps playing this game will taint my memories of Mass Effect, but even a game a fraction as absorbing as the first two are is good enough for me.

Maybe there’s a bit of recency bias in here, but Mass Effect is easily my favourite game of all time. I used to play games a lot when I was younger, but a combination of social life, anime, and the fact that Football Manager sucked away any time I would be playing other games, meant that I dropped out of gaming around the age of 14. With the help of Steam sales and totally failing at social life, I’ve been getting back into games a lot these past 2 years and I’m starting to realise the difference between a fun game and a time sink. Sure I spent a lot of time with Pokemon and Sims and Football Fucking Manager, but how much of that time was fun? Some of it certainly was, but not as consistently as the time I had with Mass Effect. So I have to have more. Mooooooooore. Give me mooooooooooooooorrrrrrrrrreeeeeeeeeee.

Oh right yeah, anime blog.

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  1. Posted November 29, 2012 at 5:58 pm | Permalink

    Twi’leks, space Muslims, space Asian scientist, etc, etc.

    ManShep has truly god-awful voice acting. He sounds dull as a stick.

  2. Moomba
    Posted November 29, 2012 at 6:05 pm | Permalink

    It’s been a long time since I played either of the two but I seem to remember always being on the ‘ME1 is better’ side of the fence. In my experience, ‘hasn’t aged well’ is just a general approximation for ‘lol it doesn’t have realistic Modern Warfare graphics’ though there was that annoying texture pop-in stuff which was kind of dodgy. ME1 felt like a grand adventure with a horrible threat looming and incredible expansive lore. ME2 reduced that threat to ‘shoot glowy lights to kill Reaper’ and never really felt much like a sequel to the original.

    I’m just going to pretend ME3 doesn’t exist.

    • Scamp
      Posted November 29, 2012 at 6:24 pm | Permalink

      While I was defending ME1 in the post, I think ME2 is probably better. The micromanaging in ME1 really is boring, but mostly it’s the loyalty missions. ME1 you learn about the characters almost entirely through talking to them, but here you really get into what makes them click with these missions. They’re fascinating character studies. Plus they give you excuses to use every character and learn how to fight with them, which the original game didn’t do that good a job of.

      I didn’t even notice a difference in the animation quality. ME2 had some weird things with shadows making faces nearly impossible to see at times. Not sure if that was intentional or my game fucking up

      • Moomba
        Posted November 29, 2012 at 6:52 pm | Permalink

        As much as I like character studies, I’ve always been much more for the overarching plot and setting which I personally enjoyed a lot more in the original game. I will acknowledge that ME2 had more interesting characters and character development (perhaps partially because it was a glorified dating sim), but I didn’t like the fact that the majority of the plot constituted little more than those interactions. It felt like an interlude designed solely to expand on characters rather than a story in its own right. You ran around recruiting people while listening to their life stories and moral dilemmas and only the final mission actually felt like it directly contributed to the trilogy’s overall plot. To exaggerate a bit, it felt like playing through the video game equivalent of a training montage leading up to the final battle.

      • Scamp
        Posted November 29, 2012 at 11:11 pm | Permalink

        I get what you’re saying, and I would agree that ME1 has a better overarching plot. But for me, Mass Effect isn’t really about the overarching plot. It’s about Talking To Dudes. That’s exactly what ME2 focuses on which is why it thrives

      • Rick
        Posted November 30, 2012 at 11:30 am | Permalink

        I agree with Scamp. Its the characters that do it for me as well. In general I find the plot rather cookie cutter. Big unknown force threatens Universe, and its up to you to save it against all odds, most of the plot twists are found in ME1 and some very Hollywood style twists in ME3, so yeah, the plot is not the highlight. What makes Mass Effect special is the combination of characters and setting along with their problems and even better, their individual culture’s issues. ME3 still has the character development, and more locations to explore. And… GASP… I liked the ending.

  3. Posted November 29, 2012 at 8:09 pm | Permalink

    Just so you know, that Mass Effect anime movie is garbage. If you ever had plans to watch it, save yourself the trouble and don’t

    • Scamp
      Posted November 29, 2012 at 11:41 pm | Permalink

      An anime based on an american created property is shit? Say it isn’t so!

  4. Mr. Anon
    Posted November 29, 2012 at 8:18 pm | Permalink

    >I never particularly cared for Tali in the first game

    But Tali is olev

  5. Chaos_Alfa
    Posted November 29, 2012 at 9:12 pm | Permalink

    Tali FTW

    You should post your thoughts of Mass Effect 3 when you’re done with it. It will be entertaining to read.

    • Scamp
      Posted November 29, 2012 at 11:22 pm | Permalink

      If people are still interested, then sure. Probably won’t be until spring, but that’s something to look forward to

  6. Golos
    Posted November 29, 2012 at 10:19 pm | Permalink

    “The council were space racists…”

    You have to earn the privilege of being one of the ruling species of the civilised space.

    • Scamp
      Posted November 29, 2012 at 11:30 pm | Permalink

      Goddamn Turian privilege

    Posted November 29, 2012 at 10:40 pm | Permalink

    I really liked ME3 and the whole time I played it I wondered to myself how it could possibly be shitty. It really did a great job leveraging your emotional investment into the series to produce an astonishingly powerful response– from me anyway– despite large amounts of what can only be described as melodrama…. which is why the ending is terrible in its blatant incongruity. It’s been said a million times already, but the ending feels like it was written by people who fundamentally did notnunderstand their own game.

    For a game that thrived on combining past experiences and accumulated knowledge to immerse the player, the ending really chooses to pop last minute revelations whilst promoting what I thought was a minor thematic element to the apparent Central Conflict. It left a terrible taste in my mouth, but I still recommend the game, if only to get an understanding of what went wrong and how– I suspect– production micromanagement finally caught up to a series that had previously managed to evade the majority of corporate oversight.

    • Scamp
      Posted November 29, 2012 at 11:34 pm | Permalink

      I think knowing the ending is a downer will lessen the effect of it for me. Maybe solving all these various world issues before the /final/ mission will be my story? For example, if the ending to ME2 was total shit, then it wouldn’t have had a big impact on my enjoyment of that because the real story is the characters getting over their issues.

      I also heard they patched in a new ending to ME3 that didn’t really fix anything. We’ll see, I’ll get to it eventually

      • Gunslinger
        Posted November 30, 2012 at 2:54 am | Permalink

        New ending doesnt really change much, they just expanded the old shitty ending a bit. The biggest issue people faced (I did too) with ME3 is pacing. It takes a really long time to get going and at times it feels silly. There’s an alien invasion obliterating earth and for the first couple of hours you’ll be doing stupid side missions. When it does pick up though, the game kicks to 11 and its awesome. Except the ending ofcourse

  8. Inushinde
    Posted November 29, 2012 at 10:43 pm | Permalink

    The one thing that always pissed me off about the second game was that each time I had a conversation with Mordin about the genophage, I always checked the option that I thought meant “I understand that you did what you had to do”, but would actually make Shepard say “Fuck you, Mordin, you froggy dick.”

    • Scamp
      Posted November 29, 2012 at 11:36 pm | Permalink

      I sometimes had that issue too. Because I wanted to hear everything people said, this meant sometimes I had to get Shepard to say dumb shit. She’d be all “durrr did you asari lady bribe them with money” while she’s blatantly hinting that she sexed them. Made Shepard look way more naive than she actually is

  9. Posted November 29, 2012 at 11:20 pm | Permalink

    I personally think that ME1 is the best of the series overall. I’ve actually played it three times in its entirety, and loved every single moment of all three playthroughs. I actually love the Mako, I loved driving around the planets and finding random shit.

    I liked the RPG style combat system, I loved the plethora of options in your skills and weapons. I just got a huge goddamn kick out of the entire game.

    Now, ME2 isn’t bad by any means. The Loyalty missions are great, and objectively, the gameplay probably is “better”, but I never really got as into it. I only finished it twice.

    ME3? ME3 is bullshit. I finished it once, right when it came out, and haven’t touched it or any of the DLC since. Fuck ME3.

    • Scamp
      Posted November 29, 2012 at 11:39 pm | Permalink

      The bit about the Mako I hate was traversing mountains. So many times it was me getting stuck. As for the RPG elements, it was one of those things I didn’t really mind in the first game, but when ME2 got rid of it I realised how much better the game was without fiddling between every mission to give them the right guns with the right ammo from level 6 cryo to level 7 cryo. This in particular is why I tended to stick with Garrus and Liara. The game is just not built to swap around members like ME2 is

  10. Thrashy
    Posted November 30, 2012 at 1:06 am | Permalink

    I rank ME up there in my top ten favorite game franchises. Hell, after I finished ME1 for the first time I sat back in my chair and thought to myself, “this must be what seeing Star Wars in theaters in 1977 felt like!”

    My entire playthrough of all three games was more-or-less all Paragon, all the time — except for the interlude on Tuchanka in ME2, where I was taking Renegade conversation interrupts whenever they came up. That moment when you get to headbutt a Krogan clansman is absolutely golden. As they say, when in Rome…

    • Scamp
      Posted November 30, 2012 at 8:34 am | Permalink

      I think I headbutted a krogan on Tuchanka as well, but there was a time where it kept telling me to stop a guy from talking by shooting at him, but he was saying such hilarious stuff I just let him talk. WE WILL TAKE THE SOLARIANS AS SLAVES AND EAT THEIR EGGS!!!

  11. Posted November 30, 2012 at 1:59 am | Permalink

    Garrus is the best romance option.

    You have chosen wisely.

    Also, I wrote a thing a while ago about roleplaying in Mass Effect, much like what you were describing.

    • Scamp
      Posted December 1, 2012 at 12:36 am | Permalink

      Garrus was the best romance in the first game too. That just all happened off screen

  12. Erif
    Posted November 30, 2012 at 5:22 am | Permalink

    “I’ll make him an ugly fucker with a huge beard, act like a big racist and see how many team-mates it is possible to have die in the last mission.”

    Haha you’re killing me Scamp.

    Let me just say this Scamp: if anyone tells you Mass Effect 3 is cap, they are bullshitting you. It’s amazing. I’m was fairly disappointed with 2, and then 3 came around and utterly blew me away. Sure, everyone has their opinions on the ending, but getting there? You won’t regret it.

    Also, buy the prothean dlc.

    • Posted November 30, 2012 at 6:37 am | Permalink

      I really really dislike the ending, but you’re right that it doesn’t change the fact that ME3 has some incredible story beats in it. I’d be lying if I said I wasn’t thoroughly enjoying the game up until the last ten minutes.

    • Scamp
      Posted December 1, 2012 at 12:38 am | Permalink

      I’ve heard about that prothean dlc, and yes I do plan to get it. Hopefully they will have a deal where all the dlc can be bought in one package

  13. luffyluffy
    Posted November 30, 2012 at 1:33 pm | Permalink

    what a terrible article write about a real video game you jerk

    (i’m kidding)

    • Scamp
      Posted December 1, 2012 at 12:38 am | Permalink

      Not video game. Didn’t you see the category this was under?

  14. Chloe
    Posted November 30, 2012 at 4:30 pm | Permalink

    “lesbian sex with aliens” You know, you should have just titled this as such. YOu just threw that opprotunity out the window. Who even needs titles that somewhat accurately describe the content!!

  15. lostsage
    Posted December 1, 2012 at 3:38 am | Permalink

    That’s why you don’t ask shitters on twitter for game opinions. People let the ending to ME3 influence how they felt about the overall game, which was just as great as ME1.

    Garrus and Mordin were easily my favorite characters. I don’t know how Garrus is with FemShep but my bromance with him as MaleShep was way more important to me than any of the female romance paths. Although Tali, Liara and Kasumi did grow on me.

    And on your male replay make sure to hang up on the council every time, many lols will be had. Also go back and probe Uranus a bunch huehue. And ME3 had such unbelievable Renegade choices that I legit turned off my console after picking one during a Renegade play-through.

    • Phenotype
      Posted December 1, 2012 at 8:47 am | Permalink

      Exactly. While ME3 suffers from some pacing and structural issues and the ending (which IS NOT AS BAD AS PEOPLE SAY), writing the whole thing off as a bad game is utterly ridiculous. There is SO MUCH of good storytelling, characterization, and gameplay in ME3, so much so that I think it overshadows the bad. There are reasons it’s the highest rated game of 2012 on Metacritic so far.

    • Scamp
      Posted December 1, 2012 at 12:42 pm | Permalink

      Oh man, I so wanted to hang up on the council but I kept wanting to hear what they said and they kept ending the calls before I did. Can’t wait to hang up on those bitches with my asshole Shepard

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